My Lonely Heart

So, yesterday at exactly 5:02 pm my boyfriend of 6 and a half years broke up with me.

What makes it worse is that on Friday I was supposed to celebrate my 25^th birthday with him.

I'm not sure as to how I am supposed to handle this or even begin to wrap my head around it. We have been together since I was 18 and he was 17. He is my first love. My first everything and I have known him for more than a third of my life. I know most people will look at this blog and think “Oh, it's another ‘woe is me’ deal.” That could be true but I hope that this will be cathartic for me.

Right now I’m not even sure if my heart feels anything. I feel like a piece of me has been ripped away and I will never get it back. Then I guess it kind of makes sense that my heart doesn’t feel anything because I’m pretty sure it was my heart that was taken. I think he still has it, clasped in his big hand, and it flutters wildly for him. But I'm sure that it knows as my brain knows that he doesn't want it anymore. So it is slowly dying because his heart won't speak to it. Won't even look at it. My heart is very lonely in his big hand. Maybe someday soon I can get it back...